ODIN TALE - PARKOUR DREAM WITHIN A DREAM OF REALITY.
My Story.
All images unless stated otherwise are google searched - credit goes to their respectful owners
I had a vision. Not a vision in the sense of ambition, of goals. My ambitions were bounded purely by the need to survive each day, each hour, each minute. Sometimes, when it was bad, each second like any other normal human on this planet. No, I had a vision of the more mystical variety, although it was not a very mystical experience for I was actually watching television at the time,hahaha...
It was an advertisement, a commercial, and it featured a dizzying vertigo moment when the camera panned over the edge of a very tall building and looked down. Somehow the fact that it was an animation didn't help it made it worse, not better. Which was odd, because I had not been afraid of heights for quite some time.
I had infact taken up the extreme sport of Parkour Free Running, which is a type of stunt work that gets used in action movies a lot, the object is to boost your adrenaline as well as a form of exercise and you literally run up, round, through, climb & over any building,park or structure and its damn right exciting & exhilarating anyway..
While I was watching this advert on the screen of someone doing it then I had this vision. I saw myself, standing on top of this very tall building, in the cool haze of a bright morning in late Autumn. I saw the access doorway, saw the drains and vents & railings, Then I was myself, I could feel the texture of the roof under my bare feet.Yes I had no shoes on,then I raised my hands before my eyes, stared at them, taking in every last detail and noting that I could get at least some idea of the overall appearance of them so I felt I was real at least.
They were my hands after all... I looked down at my clothes, the same basic mode of dress I had been wearing for more than a year. Black. Black jeanss, black t-shirt,just no sneakers. I contemplated the reason for that, dismissing affectation or statement, observing that the sight of colour against my skin actually interfered with my ability to see the world in frount of me. I looked at my feet again, barely recognising them, looked at my legs, my arms. My sense of detachment, of being in the wrong place in the wrong body, grew..almost like a shape-shifter 'P' shift experience.....And adrenaline raced through my veins as my vision took hold...
In my vision I fixed my eyes on a patch of blue sky and started to run towards it, not realising it ended with my departure from the roof top into mid air... As I ran I was thinking "If this is what it takes, so be it," and I was remembering that someone once told me it is impossible to make a horse jump over the edge of a long, steep drop. The animal will refuse.
Yet I ran, focusing my entire being on that single patch of eggshell blue, not feeling the impact on my feet they didn't exist really..., not feeling anything really through my whole body, almost like a black Wolf running for his life on pure adrenaline, not allowing myself to feel anything either, I was feeling almost dead inside, just a nothingness inside this carcass I called my outer human shell..
The sky opened up to me. I was running, had been running, until there was nothing left but sky.
I spread my arms, splayed my fingers as if they had feathers at there tips like a bird or ahuman angel maybe , I even leaned forward into the rushing air without taking my eyes off that one piece of sky ahead of me. And I laughed, smiled, tears built up in my eyes but I did not weep, as I rushed forward into the blue even as I dropped down, & far down, but for an instant my wings did spread wide from my sides and I sailed with the wind rushing past my ears, and my hair flapping around my face twirling and coiling into ringlets, and I then watch as these huge storm clouds suddenly came rolling in over my head from the distance, the wind then was howling across the hill tops in the distance too.
I could hear it roaring & rush up into these fluffy black clouds ..& suddenly lightning flashed in twirling spikes like spears thrown to catch a fish, then the sound of thunder in my ears but then just as suddenly as it was heard this then turned to deadly silence,.... it stopped as fast as it had began.. you know the silence that happens after a storm of this magnitude, everything is all quite except that soft rustle of leaves in the wind swept trees and the crinkling of dry leaves blowing in swirling circles on the ground...where did that come from all of a sudden it was amazing?...
Then suddenly a image of a man rough and clothed in cloaks of fur like that of Odin standing on a pile of rocks while writing in a huge book with a feather quil pen in his hand as if taking notes of what he had just seen before him and he had a writing book, but also one other book it was under his arm,... he looks up directly at me and his voice boomed loud from his crinkled and aged grey ash coloured lips, while a beard long and twisting lay across his lap coiling to the ground the wind was blowing it at the same time and a black wolf lay at his feet.... I fixated on that wolf for a time and then I could hear him loudly bellowing at me in a deep sound as if matching the thunder in the clouds crashing above him....
"No you stupid Raven, how could you!!...what are you doing bird, you cant do this, you cant fly from my shoulder, you'll loose your way and fail ...you are not my memory you know...well you are but only but my thoughts, so don't be so damn foolish son, look what your doing did you think at all for just one minute"...
No because nor did I?..was my next thought in my head and I responded it back to him...
"No,I think not you've been watching too much 'Assassins Creed' on the ghod damn Tv & now your believing your something your not" he said...
my brain said "what? in my head..
"Look bird, don't you see your path lies in frount of you, if you so only care to find it that is, your not looking hard enough though silly bird, just wait till the skies turn blue and your way will be more clear to glide & for your eyes to see"...
Then suddenly I hear a flutes tranquil song encasing my inner being, that of an ancient Native tribal beat of a far away drum sound, it reminded me like that of a snake charmers chant, but with a definite tribal shaman shrill infused between its beats..or just like the ancient viking war cry of ages past and I feel this sensation inside myself my core solar plex like I'm not suppose to be there. Deep inside me this yearning feeling of already knowing kinda like de'javu,
I need to feel the land under my feet ....
Parkour was my passion and a part of me was the next thought through my head & then I see myself, turn back & return to look at this old man looking like Odin & I saw my long hair looking like black wings still flapping at my side,my feet had turned to talons, and then just as suddenly things changed back to this reality again and time frame and onto the hard ground below I fell...Damn!! Ouch that hurt..real bad..took my breath out of me,I lay there and I believe I lost consciousness for what seemed like only a minute to me, but my parkour mates said I was out for over 2 minutes and they were thinking of doing CPR till I came round and then the ambulance arrived, ...so off I went to A & E to have Xrays & ultrasound done,and to be told the bad news, ...Just what had I done to myself!..
Well I'd smashed & torn my whole bursa right off the bone that will never repair and I'd also torn my rota cuff Supraspinatus muscle also, but that would repair given rest & time... luckily no broken bones,how I dodged that I dont know....and yet I couldn't move my arm or my fingers, I was really sucking on the green whistle like a drug addict getting a hit, it was not a pleasant experience having to wear a sling for so long too..yet I was off to see the surgeon in a few weeks time,to get his verdict on if I required a operation... but when I saw him he said no he wasn't going to go in & ordered me to have 12 mths of physio & acupuncture instead, no more physical sports & to take it easy on myself, all while dodging the knife, phew!....
I ended up with a frozen shoulder, from it though...but at least I could use my arm,I couldn't lift it over my head & so parkour was out, in fact all physical workouts were out, never to be achieved again, I was crushed..
~*~
Back to my vision I was actually hallucinating.. I am a human and real.. not a damn bird, I thought this then in my head...I should never have got into this extreme sport of fast running its dangerous, even though its darn exciting as hell!!
. The entire episode, from first seeing myself in this state of mind to the paradoxical joy and pain at being split in two dimensions, but still as one, was over before the next advert started, and I was almost in tears.
Alone, as I was so much most of the time, there was no one around to notice, yet still I wept & kept weeping,as I was actually in a state of emotional grief, pining knowing I was never going to be able to do what I loved the most again... yet it was such an amazing vision all the same...
But then it wasn't Autumn at all either, it was actually the beginning of Winter, although the weather was mixed up and strange... I felt as unsettled as the weather. I had been restless for months, feeling trapped, caged. I felt suffocated and sometimes wondered if dolphins felt like that when they became trapped in drift nets and were drowning. The vision came out of the blue and chimed a note deep inside of me. It had been so strong, that final point of separation so clear, I thought, I almost knew I could do it all again.
I could make that break, could force it upon myself, but only by giving myself no other way. In a way I thought that if I did not make it entirely, it would not matter.
In my vision I had been split between Sky and Earth, and one of the possibilities showed me landing miraculously unharmed, because there was nothing in the flesh at the moment of impact to be harmed.
Was it perhaps preferable to the other escape I had considered? The final pilgrimage to the one place I pined for more than any other, the long trek leaving my identity and pain behind me, to plunge with my laughing heart into the turbulent whirlpool of the city night lights. I was not sure tho. One involved more mess, the other more uncertainty. I had dreamed of both like a pilgrimage of sorts.
Anyway and occasionally, I'd dance with the traffic and coming close to being squashed or battered to death, I didn't care I would cry. I would drive, with tears streaming down my face, not because I had come close to the end, but because it had missed me, because I was left with the responsibility of fighting the pain to stay alive or forcing escape by my own hand....
That responsibility weighed heavy at times. Almost too heavy.
Image - Ꮙℓἇ∂ἇ..aka Reɪvən ღ © - All Right Reserved
And through it all, inside I sat in the bare room of my house with the thoughts in my head racing to nowhere fast, and the uneasiness of Instinct and the Rationalist combined, looked out of the window and dreamed of Summer once more...I drew my own sketch picture that resembled the man in the sky that I saw, using a client of mine as the muse for it, he actually reminded me of 'Father Jack' in the tv series 'Father Ted' its a British comedy series based on a Irish Priest in a Parrish, & father Jack was a old priest who had turned into a alcoholic, but his facial expressions reminded me of Odin at least...but I left him unfinished as the story itself was not yet over, just another page of the book was about to be turned..
Raven Leads My Way Again..
©2020 Ꮙℓἇ∂ἇ ኔጡ። aka Reɪvən
All Rights Reserved.
Free Running Inspiration
Comments
Its so easy to talk about your own life,...but when it comes to telling stories not connected to you is another, but the best way is to enter your 3rd eye and it all comes forth, I've written huge stories from past life recall experiences from my planet for my niece & nephew that way..I might share some in this group later..
Thank you Vlada You are the most unique, wonderful storyteller...I know...
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